Tuesday, December 6, 2011

    Ode to Literacy, 90s Style: Blame It On Big Jane

    If you get this, you must have been a teen in the 90s, and you're probably a bit of a nerd now. :)

    This is what I do when I want to write, but I can't focus on my current WIP.

    So, I wrote this one after learning that someone I know hates Jane Austen. I know, I know, it really is terrible. There's no accounting for taste.

    For all of my students who were BORN in the 90s, here's the video that inspired this song.


    To the tune of Milli Vanilli's Blame it On the Rain:

    Blame It On Big Jane



    You said you didn’t read her
    But you couldn’t say why
    You sacrificed some good tomes
    Ignoring Sense and Pride

    Now you wish that you had tried her
    ‘Cause you’re shunned from our book club
    Fridays won’t be the same
    If you’d just read Persuasion
    Gotta blame it on something
    Gotta blame it on something

    Blame it on Big Jane, yeah that would be Ms. Austen
    Blame it on her use of words like “sanguine”
    Her stories misconstrued
    Where’d you get that book review?
    Blame it on Big Jane, yeah yeah
    You can blame it on Big Jane

    Heard the girls’ eyes were all starry
    And the men were all strong
    But oh, you’re so far from facts
    You had poor Jane pegged wrong (oh, ohhh)
    If you hadn’t been so blinded (blinded)
    You might still have a book group
    But you have bones to pick
    Who spells “Austen” with an “e”?
    Gotta blame it on something
    Gotta blame it on something

    Blame it on Big Jane (it’s not that you’re forestalling)
    Blame it on Marianne (who wants love at first sight?)
    So easy to see through
    The admiration is undue
    Blame it on Big Jane, yeah yeah
    Go on and blame it on Big Jane
    On characters refined
    Society unfair
    You got to blame it on something

    Blame it on Big Jane (you heard her women are galling)
    Take Emma Woodhouse—she’s not exactly forthright
    It’s all a ballyhoo
    All overrated, says you
    Blame it on Big Jane, yeah yeah

    You can blame it on Big Jane

    Blame it on Big Jane yeah yeah
    Blame it on Big Jane yeah yeah

    Blame it on Big Jane (you can blame it Big Jane, blame it on Big Jane, blame it on Big Jane, baby)
    Blame it on the story lines she did write
    Blame it on Big Jane (Blame it, blame it on Big Jane)
    It’s all just much ado
    Not your fault you eschewed
    Blame it on Big Jane, yeah yeah

    Gotta blame it on something
    You just don’t like her writing

    If you blame it on Big Jane, your taste must be appalling
    Name another author that inspires such delight
    We have to say adieu
    No room in book club for you
    Disdain for our dear Jane, no way!

    - Lori Oster, AKA Brainy ForJaney

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